Relativity redux (1 of n): E pluribus immobiles

(yeah, ok, I don't actually know Latin)

So, here's another go at explaining Special Relativity. I remain annoyed at how few people really get it, even amongst avid SF consumers, entirely too accustomed to generations of SF writers papering over FTL issues with technobabble, 'cause we need that galactic empire, don'tcha know.

Also, it's long past time to dump poorly motivated 1930s pedagogy that real physicists abandoned long ago (e.g.,. "Your mass increases as you go faster", "What? why?", "Fuck you, it just does" [spoiler alert: just No; forget you ever heard that. And if, in 2026, anyone is still trying to teach it that way, someone needs to sit them down for A Talk]).

All we need is basic geometry you knew or could have learned about in 6th grade plus a bit of algebra (up to Pythagorean Theorem). I think I can get by without using a single square-root sign.

But there will be fewer handwaves this time. Because we have to be clear why things have to Not Be The Way You Expected and not leave wiggle room. Here goes:

The speed of light as a constant

Shine a flashlight off of a moving boat. How fast does the light go?

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Relativity (2 of n): Meet the Moving People

My revamped explanation of Special Relativity, trying to keep it completely geometric and not invoking Walls of Math, continued from here where I have now completely beaten to death the concept of "Stationary" and it's time to

Meet the Moving People

Actually, we're going to be particular about who we associate with. We want Moving People who will likewise be able to say that they don't think of themselves as moving, meaning they can't be accelerating or spinning, either. Which leaves having them coast at some constant velocity that is non-zero (because otherwise they'd be stationary and One of Us) and upwards (just to pick a direction).

We also want them moving slower than lightspeed (STL), for Reasons.

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